Sunday Morning Shenanigans 

  1. I wake up groggy eyed and disoriented from some strange dreams. I dreamt about how my vegetarian flat mate is back after a long holiday and she’s scrubbed the fridge clean of any traces of chicken and egg. I’m slightly guilty but annoyed that I didn’t take necessary precautions and hide / finish the stuff earlier. I get out of bed, and it’s too quiet, there are no bags in the hallway. So she isn’t really here. Go back to the drugged sleep. To wake up in another world where my cousin has an interview lined up and I have to report for my internship duties at a social media firm. It’s close to eleven and I’m so late. It’s around twelve when I’m ready and I’m thinking of excuses to convince the boss I wasn’t coming late for fun. 
  2. The reason for this drugged, still sleepy feeling is probably the oil on my mane. It’s raining like crazy outside and I have no intention of moving from the balcony into the shower. I guess we’ll let nature take its time with the downpour and watch and listen to the sounds. 
  3. That’s my view. Our maid has kept the spare umbrella in the balcony and that’s sort of blocking my view. 

  4. We don’t have any onion or tomatoes. I am not sure what I’ll do for lunch. Or breakfast. But I do not have the mental capacity to think so far ahead. 
  5. Its a four day work week and that makes me happy. So yaaay. 

That’s all, folks, from this sleepy, 25-year  old. I’m busy taking baby steps to know or tell you any more. Adios. 

New people. 

You know that feeling when you get so comfortable with your homies, you stop looking for friendship from the other people in the universe? Well, that’s a scary place to be.  But it’s also nice knowing that you don’t have to keep finding people all the time. I’m usually amazed at how some people just hit it off with everyone they meet. Everyone? How!? 

I wasn’t looking for new connections that would mean a lot in such a short span of time.. But I cannot imagine the past few days any differently. I just love how some positivity can change the way you feel about life..I’ve always wanted to go visit our neighboring countries since childhood.. It’s been a dream and my resolve has only becomee stronger now. Thanks ‘Shna,’Uja and’Aid for helping me break a few stereotypes in my mind. 

I also happened to meet one of the people who recruited me to this organization where I currently work at. I was trying to go upto him and speak from a long time but there never was an opportunity. When I finally spotted him talking to a friend, I went over to say  hi and it was a privilege to have him remember my name. He asked whether we were settling in well and if we liked everything. He even remembered my blog. I mean. Wow. People amaze me, they do. You’ve got the extremes everywhere but it’s really nice coming up on genuine nice gems. Goodnight, amigos! 

Flow

Hi there!

I hope the world is treating you fine. I know it’s been a while and I haven’t really written much except for heartfelt poems that take on a bit of vanity and diverge from true feelings, because of the need to appeal to the poetic sensibilities.

I love writing in Italics. I remember going to my first job interview. It was for the post of a content writer and I had to write two articles before I was shortlisted for the interview. First job, start-up scenes and everything happened in a matter of a few hours. I just got ready at five thirty pm and told my folks that I was going to this place.. I’ve got the second round – that of an interview. They didn’t know I applied to one. (Oh wait. I see a trend here. They didn’t know I applied to SIMC either.) Dad dropped me to the office and although I was called ‘immediately’, the recruiters did not seem to be in any hurry to talk to me. I waited, observed, smiled at some people and just sat there wondering – what do I expect? What do I talk about myself.

I was finally ushered into a room and it was a very relaxed interview. I vividly recall the interviewer saying, ‘Your articles were fine and all. There were a few errors that aren’t too serious. But tell me, was there any purpose that you kept it all in italics?’.

‘I just like how it flows’, was my response. There was some amount of bewilderment in his expressions and then we laughed it out. But it’s true. I like that things will flow. Do you know, a hand-writing expert once said to me in 10th grade, that how you right actually reveals a lot about your state of mind. A left title to your overall writing indicates that you tend to linger in the past, a right-side tilt means that you are constantly thinking about the future. Yes, those of you with a straight, no-tilt writing, are more rooted in the present. P1120314

It’s amazing isn’t it? Little things that have so much significance. My room-mate and I are currently watching Westworld and I can’t help but think about the reveries bit. Small, seemingly insignificant things, harboring greater impacts than seen on the surface.

I’m digging through the archives for old photos and memories. Will be back soon.

So long, amigos. Stay safe! 🙂 

 

 

Questions

I don’t understand why I should do that to you. 

Why should I put you on a pedestal when I don’t do that to muself. 

Why should I link everything you, to everything me. 

If I’m having a bad day and want to reach out to you. And you’re not there, can I get mad? 

If you’re having a bad day and you don’t reach out. How am I supposed to know, and  why does that make me bad? 

It takes two to make it work. 

I keep hearing that it’s got an amazing and a lovely perk.

Do you see it happening? The happily ever after? 

When day by day, the communication is sparse and so is the laughter. 

Not everything is measured, there isn’t any need for it. 

But despite trying, if it’s not becoming a hit,

Perhaps it was a flop,one from the beginning. 

Time and situations, making it infuriating. 

You’re always finding faults and I’m left wandering. 

Maybe I’m just fresh out the oven, soft and burning. 

I’m in a Happy space. Its all going okay.

That’s  exactly what you don’t get, the feeling of okay. 

Wake up, breathe and smell the coffee. 

Oh  wait, it’s empty. That’s life, it’s all iffy. 

Transitions

Bidding adieu sucks but you’ve got to do it because transitions make you grow…

Hi readers,

I must admit that what I actually set out to do while writing the previous post was not to write it. Nah-uh, I actually wanted something to surpass the older posts and instead of coming up with something new, something non poetic, I ended up publishing a half-written draft in my sleep. 

Now that my royally loyal reader HashBrownie has asked me what I’m made of, I think it’s time to take a break from that bubble of procrastination and step out into the sunshine!

Here’s what’s been going on.

Two years of college are coming to an end. That’s bidding adieu to two of the best years of life.

I know it’s not easy to measure yardsticks when you talk of ‘best days’.

Think about having beautiful sunsets as the backdrop of your home, evenings that start off as hot and sultry but if you’re not careful, end up feeling frost bitingly cold.

Think about living in spacious rooms, (with balconies to sip tea in, mind you) with pleasant roomies who just let you be. (Warts, farts, darts et al).

Think about the cold coffee, hot coffee, ice cream sandwich, and the gulab jamuns at the mess.

Think of the people who you surround yourself with. Those who make you smile and laugh and cry at the same time.

Friends who instil a dependency on you that makes you realise you are important. Friends who you thought were loud and bossy but actually ended up loving and living with. Friends who you fell in love with, despite their stupidest idiosyncracies.

Yes. The hills were alive to all these sounds and intuitions. They’ve seen my sweat, my tears, and my joys. It’s honestly satisfying to see that you make a difference.

The belief that Sometimes, actually, most times, your integrity and work will suffice.

Anyway. As I step out of this beautiful place I called home for two years, I know I will always call it home. The home that grew on me and steadied me to a future I didn’t think I could have, I’ve only got the deepest sense of gratitude for this experience. To all the forces of the universe, who made it happen.

My peers are off on a spree of rants about how much they’ll miss this place. Interestingly, I finished this nostalgia in the third semester, with my besties around me. Everyday I’d look out and go ‘Daaamn, I’ve got to move on from this. How does one do that?’

I think I’ve found my answer. You get to transition from your phases in life when you have the hope to find better.

Every time you are down, remember, there’s something that’s been eluding you but it can be yours, with some dedication, effort and time.

Find your homes, not in the four walls of a building but find your homes in people. It’s people that make you want to believe in the best of you. It’s people, who will be there for you. and then you’ll know, goodbyes won’t be hard. They’ll just be something that you have got to do.

Find you home and then you’ll know. Goodbyes won’t be hard. They’ll just be something that you have got to do.

This is me bidding adieu to college life as I had known and loved. 

Here’s to newer and more enriching things in life to all of us.

Life Is Beautiful. Believe It. And You’ll Feel It.

It’s truly been the end of an era.

Adios, SIMC.

 Break and Make.

I cry. That’s how I cope.

When I feel all is lost and there’s no hope.

It doesn’t matter what the surrounding is,

I feel like I’m stuck in an incessant abyss.

Your people drift away,

You realize that you really don’t have any say.

That person, you thought, your love, come true,

Is but another form of Monday blue.

Speak of it, to feel better, you must

To begin a new quest, it is the only thrust.

Of lighter hearts and lovely people,

Trust your instincts, don’t be frugal.

Permutations of humor, beauty and sound mind,
Begin anew, these treasures you’ll find.

 

 

It’s not a date…

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You cannot come into my life so late,

And expect to be my best mate.

I am mean, selfish and bad.

You cannot change me, I’m not a fad.

If you can’t get me, don’t belittle,

I’m not your melodious, favorite fiddle. 

You don’t need to lower your expectations,

But you’ve got to remember everyone has their tribulations.

Look at us, it’s been so short a while,

It doesn’t feel like we’ve even walked a mile.

You need to know, you are not my moon.

If I called you that, I’d be the loon. 

Just remember, we’re not auditioning to be a toon.

Let me find my way,

Don’t hurry me into a sway.

Our journey together has only began,

Don’t push me away, for I’m being taken.

Let’s wait together and give it time,

For it’s still yet to come, our prime.

I can’t show you love the way you want it,

Let me shower it on you when you least expect it.

I’ve got a lot of pride,

Don’t think I’ll make a good bride.

I’ve built my fortress strong and firm,

Equipped from experience for a storm any term.

To reach the sanctum, you’re gonna have to break some walls,

It may need us both to take a few falls.

I’ve got a ready tongue,

So much that the fun loses pun.

But I’m as perfect as perfect can be,

In my mind, that’s how I see me.

I’m putting myself first, it’s what I do.

Wood carvings and lead, I’m a writer, so.

I give you the right to sharpen me,

Throw the shavings and a jagged edge you’ll see.

Let’s walk together, and see how we fare.

Handle each other with a little more care. 

 

 

Musafir Hoon Yaaron!

I have a new, old-favorite song and it’s been buzzing in my head all day. I guess I’m indulging in a lot of retro. Here are the lyrics of the new love:

Musafir Hoon Yaaron

Na Ghar Hai, Na Tikhana

Mujhe Chalte Jaana Hai

Bas… Chalte Jaana Hai!

 

I love the melody and how peaceful it is. I do have a home and I do have shelter but I find it a solace to just keep moving on, traveling and experiencing the simplest pleasures of life.

Here’s the video if you want to revel in the beauty of this timeless music by R.D Burman in the soulful voice of Kishore Kumar.

 

First Crush(ed)

Take a few minutes off to re-live those awkward teem memories?

I remember it as clearly as it happened. I had just finished the captain duties after school. It was a major rule in our institution that all the kids were to form a straight line (I know it’s redundant in itself but some Indianisms really get me pumped) as they exited their classrooms and walked down multiple corridors to the gate beyond. I loathed a lot of things about this  particular school and this rule often left me feeling caged. Come to think of it – the last bell of school heralds a promise of unspoken excitement and things are meant to get crazy with everyone jostling, trying to get out of the institution first. It is an indication that they survived another day with our education system after all! Although I hated them, at this point of life, I can sympathize with some of the rules – they were probably put in place to ensure that no stampedes occurred.

As I walked back to class, to wrap my bags and head to Abacus lessons (Yes, I’d chosen to enrich my brain with the mental prowess of Abacus) I met my friend  Zit (That’s the closest I can get to not revealing his name. It also helps that all girls find zits annoying. Pun intended). I must tell you beforehand that I’d studied my entire life (until 7th std) in a girls school and in this school, I had but a few guy friends.

Zit seemed to be in a perturbed mood. I thought I’d talk to him and figure out why was he so morose? Which girl had he fallen for so suddenly that he couldn’t smile and just be?

He refused to answer to my insistent queries and just smirked and sulked away. I packed my bags and went up to him, ‘Come on! You can tell me, you know? I’ll keep it a secret.’

‘Who’s the lucky one?’, I ventured. Feeling a little cheesy and trying to be the cool girl best friend they often show you in Hollywood movies.

Little did I expect the reply, ‘You!’.

I was momentarily stunned and laughed it out. ‘You can’t be serious. Come on now, take the suspense off.’

‘No, I’m serious. It’s you’, he persisted. Now the wind just knocked out of me. It’s one thing to pull your friends’ legs and another when you’re going to find yourself in a similar situation. I went to abacus class in a stony silence and my mind was in a tizzy. Was I to feel elated that someone thought me crush-worthy? Or was I to feel bad and angry that a ‘good friend’ had just made things super awkward?

All my teenage fancies and wishful thinking about the situation came to the right conclusion when after abacus Zit met me and said, ‘I’ve got a gift for you’ and he proceeded to take a wrapped item that looked ridiculously like a book. It was a weird feeling then, I was left wondering whether people began dating when gifts were exchanged? Was it just the girl who got the gift? How do things like these work really? I was tempted to take the book. (The surprise was killing me too. Would he just lend it to me so I could read it later on?)  I denied the book and told him I’d err really ike to go home for now.

Life has a way of giving you answers when you really need them and that’s what happened.

Any semblance of romance that I’d gathered in the last few moments went out of the door as soon as I walked out of school to see Zit’s friends hovering about; cycling, playing, kicking stones and basically just waiting to hear from the brave one.

‘Did she say yes, macha?’

And that was that!